You may belong to a cowboy church if

If there are more spit cups than coffee cups in the trash after services
If when telling of a medical condition someone says,” he got the scours” and everyone knows what he’s talking about
If your cutting horse has more formal training than your pastor
If the pastor has ever had to break up a fight over whether a Ford or Chevy was the best kind of ranch truck
If pray for rain is a permanent and printed line on the prayer request form
If on the Sundays that you baptize, the horses go thirsty until 1:00 pm.
If the elders were ever called out to anoint with oil and pray over a “sure enough good” roping horse.
If rectal palpation was ever used as a sermon illustration
If ” the devil went down to Georgia” is considered a Church song
If roping dummies are considered playground equipment
If the domino game of 42 is considered a contact sport
If starched wranglers are considered formal attire
If tofu is thought to be a foot condition
If calf fries are a staple at most pot luck suppers
If all of your church hymns start with a fiddle kick off
If your communion bread is really a flour tortilla
If the legend of doc bar and poco bueno are acceptable bedtime stories.
If a cow dog has ever interrupted a prayer service
If the PBR finals are considered church holiday
If your horse has gone to the chiropractor but you haven’t
If when someone mentions a feller having a PHD and the congregations thinks that stands for post hole diggers.
If you have ever ate a church potluck supper out of Dutch ovens
If a barrel horse has ever been the church prayer list
If your pastor has ever been given a saddle gun as a present from the church
If your pastor has ever been called on to help in the delivery of a calf
If your pastor has ever used a palpation glove in order to keep his sleeves dry while baptizing people.
If your church’s sign was cut out and put together in a welding shop
If your church parking lot hast to be dragged, leveled and rerocked every two years.
If your pastor has permanent indemnification card at the county jail
If the elders ever had to call a workday to build a barbered wire fence to keep cattle out of your church parking lot
If you know the difference between rough stock and light weight stockers
if you ever had to avoid horse manure in the church parking lot
If you where ever took a quarter tablet of “butte” to get over roping wreck
If your pastor carries and knife that has a hoof pick as one of the blades
If mugging has nothing to do with a “stick-up”
If your pastor has ever had to warm up his horse before he was to preach off of him